A Lifetime Crush Alone

That title is a bit misleading because I’m surely not the only one absolutely in love with Macaulay Culkin. Many kids grew up in the glorious haze of the ‘90s who dreamed of either being the boy wonder, or wanting to be with him. For me, it was a little bit of both. He was adorable. There was no denying that Thomas J. Sennett would’ve been the ideal best friend turned middle school boyfriend had those fucking bees not gotten in the way. On the flip side, Culkin was also the star of several films in which he didn’t perish via allergic reaction or being left to fall to his death (‘The Good Son’ is wild) that made him admirable. I mean, who didn’t want to have a healthy amount of cash, credit cards, and no parental controls in NewA Lifetime Crush Alone York City? Exactly. Even today, I’m drawn to the…I’ll say the essence of Macaulay Culkin in a way that has made him a crush tucked deep inside the crevices of my aging heart. 

‘Home Alone’ was 100% the first time I’d seen Culkin. Unless you happened to see ‘Uncle Buck’ before that, Kevin McCallister was his initial introduction to most ‘90s kids back in the day. Not only was this a holiday movie, but it also starred someone who was a legit kid. Being able to see someone your age, or not that much older in a role like that was everything back then. A gift that sadly, doesn’t really exist too much today. Hey kids of today, do you even have celebs your age you admire or is it just people on YouTube? Anyways, Culkin became an instant “I will watch just about anything he’s in” after that. There were four solid years of the ‘90s where it was Macaulay Culkin’s world and we were just living in it. 

And while the sequel to ‘Home Alone’ in the Big Apple was as astounding as the original and later, ‘Richie Rich,’ Culkin was able to prove he wasn’t a one-trick pony in those four years either. He did animation with ‘The Pagemaster,’ again…broke motherfucking hearts in ‘My Girl,’ and even showcased some dark shit was brewing inside with ‘The Good Son.’ I remember me and my mom being like, yo…this is some heavy ass shit. It’s a given that you can tell someone’s age if you ask them about ‘The Good Son’ and they immediately exclaim, “THE CLIFF” or “THE ICE.” 

If you’ve yet to see that movie – please do so right now. Again, it’s…wild. 

‘The Good Son’ dropped in 1993, and after a trio of releases the following year…Culkin pretty much fell off the face of the planet for almost a whole decade. When he did emerge, he played convicted felon Michael Alig in ‘Party Monster.’ Not too long after he starred alongside Mandy Moore as her brother in ‘Saved!’ For as much as I adore Culkin, I still have yet to see one but consider the other one of my all-time favorite movies. Can you guess which is which? 

Since then he hasn’t done too much. Which, when you spent four years of your childhood churning out movies, some that are still revered today, you’re allowed to pick and choose. But man oh man was I more than thrilled to see him join the ‘American Horror Story’ franchise and act his ass off alongside one of the queens of that universe, Sarah Paulson. He was great. The season as a whole? Not so much. Here’s to hoping Ryan Murphy brings him back for a lengthier role on a future, better season. 

Along with ‘AHS,’ Macaulay Culkin has also been getting into the swing of things with a hilarious Onion meets Goop site called Bunny Ears. It’s a way for him to put his creativity out into the world without the hullabaloo he faced as a kid. I’m happy he’s doing well because we all know that child stars don’t always make it to adulthood with everything intact. Perhaps that decade or so away was necessary and today, Culkin continues to be someone I both admire and crush on. 

Stay tuned for a week of lifelong crushes as we talk to the host of ‘Hell is a Musical’ and ‘Writer’s Bagel Basket’ about his pick who is a real trooper, and If you’d like to read more about my love of Macaulay Culkin, head here.

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