There are a few movies from the ‘90s that in hindsight make me wonder, why was that appealing to me (and a whole lot of other kids) at that time? A few of them happened to star Diane Keaton, but she’s not the focus here today as we dive into a May/December crush. I will say that I was insanely jealous of Keaton though. That is because she got to star opposite one of the most handsome men I’d ever laid eyes on in elementary school, and that’s Steve Martin.
In reality ‘Father of the Bride’ dropped before I packed my ‘Little Mermaid’ lunchbox for kindergarten. However, I don’t think I fully watched and understood the movie until a few years later. It was then that a crush fully formed. Who was that white-haired man who appeared to be a grandpa but at the same time played basketball effortlessly and loved sneakers? In the movie the Banks were supposed to be in their 40s, and in real life Steve Martin was four years shy of 40 when the first movie was released. So yeah, over three decades were separating me from the father of the bride AKA my future husband, but I didn’t care.
My parents were more than 20 years apart, so an age gap never felt that odd to me. Yeah, they didn’t last, but the guy she dated throughout my childhood was almost a decade older than her, so again – was age something I really needed to be concerned about when it came to my love of George Banks? I think not.
So the crush only intensified by the time I was able to rent the sequel because Steve Martin really went above and beyond the second time around in the comedy department, and as a kid – that’s what I wanted. Him, Jim Carrey, Buster Bunny – these were all men that made me laugh and it didn’t matter that they were older or animated rabbits. I just knew my heart belonged to them.
Today, my love of Buster is in the past, and I’d still give myself to Jim Carrey if given the chance, but as for Steve Martin? Um…He just turned 78, and well, YES. The crush remains as ever-present as the first time I popped in ‘Father of the Bride’ on a Friday night with a piece of Little Ceaser’s in hand. Why? Well, to me he has aged perfectly fine and the funny is still there, so what’s not to still love about this man? Plus, the age gap between us now seems a lot less weird now that I’m approaching the big 4-0. Hey, if Dennis Quaid can marry someone born the year ‘Jurassic Park’ dropped, then me and Steve can live happily ever after too.
‘Father of the Bride’ and its sequel really did a number on me as a child and if either of them happens to be on, or I see they’re streaming – I’m going to stop and watch because Martin’s George Banks is one of my favorite comedic performances. And yes, he’s insanely attractive in those movies. Also, have you ever Googled what Steve Martin looked like in the 1970s?
Now I’ll forever love my white-haired prince charming, but if time travel were an option and I could head back to the days of avocado green appliances and bell bottoms, I’d risk it all to try and hook up with at a ‘Saturday Night Live’ after party in the late ‘70s. Then I’d take another trip back to the ‘50s for James Dean, but that’s another story for another day.
Steve Martin wasn’t the first older guy I fell for, I’m sure of it but he’s been one of the most consistent in my heart that whenever he’s on TV, I just sit and stare with little hearts in my eyes because after all this time, he’s still got that initial funny guy charm that roped me in all those years ago.
Crushgasm 