For a long time, I thought California would be the place I lived my entire life because hello, the weather! Also because…what real reason would I ever have to leave, a job? Yeah, right. If you’ve ever seen the folder in my Yahoo account labeled “Rejections” then you know I’m the least employable human on earth. Anyway, one day it was decided that I’d rip the band-aid off and leave the place I swore I never would. I’m sharing this today because this week musician David Hobbes is coming through to crush on home, and the idea of…and when I finally moved, my idea of home made it into a Fresh Prince song because it got flipped-turned upside down.
2020 was hell for everyone. We don’t have to get into why that is because if you’re able to read this then you’re old enough to remember. However, I’d say the following year was worse for me because back-to-back my stepdad and mom decided to have major heart surgeries, with my mom’s surgery not going as well as her husband’s. We almost lost her during the initial surgery, and the lack of oxygen made her brain unusual for quite some time. I won’t rattle on the whole story, but just know that a heart surgery and then a leg infection caused her to be away from home much longer than expected – and in between trying to wrap my head around that and make sure her house was still standing while she was away, I was planning on moving across the country.
My guy wanted to be near his family and after a couple of years in lockdown, I realized that California isn’t really any different from anywhere else when you’re confined to an apartment. Yes, we lived near the beach and it was great to be able to jog there daily but like you’ll hear on David’s episode, the cost of living was draining and, again, my lack of real employment was hitting me more and more. So I made like a pop punk song and said, let’s go!
We left in the middle of October 2021 and after three days and two hotel stays, we were in a new place; Harrisonburg, VA. It sits at the base of the mountains and a pretty popular National Park destination and is mostly known for being the home of James Madison University. It wasn’t the most happening place, but it was now home and I wondered if I’d ever feel at home there. It was hard at first. No friends or family nearby, and nowhere I could walk to regularly. It’s not a city made for walking, and it barely worked for jogging. Thankfully our apartment spot had a gym area we could use. We’d eventually end up packing up and moving again after two years, but thinking back – was it ever home?
I think home is where you feel a connection, and in Harrisonburg, I connected to one thing and that was a charity I volunteered with, and eventually became infused into as a board member. When I was there, it felt comfortable. Obviously, my apartment was the same way. I’m always at home around my stuff. So when it came time to move again, I was only really saying goodbye to one thing as opposed to when I left California and said adios to a lifetime of connections. In the end, Virginia was a pitstop but I wouldn’t call it a significant home in my life’s story.
As for Columbus, I’ve only been here a few months and I’ve already started making more connections here than I did in our previous spot as I’m working at an elementary school and speaking daily to people who aren’t college-aged students who viewed me as a senior citizen. Plus, I’m working with kids and I can only hope that at least one remembers me when they’re my age the same way I do my teacher’s aides from back in the day.
I never thought I could find comfort outside of the Southern California sun, but after I initially moved, my aunt on my dad’s side told me something I carry with me…something along the lines of, you gotta get outta where you’re from to grow and to experience life outside of what you know. So while Virginia never quite gave me the home connection, it was a nice pitstop in life that pushed me out of my shell and allowed me to see that I could live outside of the good weather of the place I called home for over three decades.
Crushgasm 
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